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Monday, February 25, 2013

Mom Saver Mondays: Fold Over Sleeves


My little one is now, incredibly, 3 weeks old, and while so much has changed over the last several weeks, one thing hasn't: his arms are all over the place. 

This is particularly unfortunate when he's nursing. He can barely control his arms long enough to latch on, and before you know it--wham!--I get whapped in the boob.

This is painful.

Even more painful if his scratchy little fingernails are exposed.

He's far too small to clip them, so we try to keep them filed, but even so--they're sharp, scratchy, and hit you when you least expect it. 

Various stores will sell you wee little mitts to slip over baby's hands. These things are useless. Baby wiggles out of them faster than he wiggles out of socks. That's pretty darn fast.

But there is an answer: fold over sleeves.

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Some Carter's sleep 'n' plays have them, as do some Old Navy one piece sleepers.

An extra flap of fabric is sewn to the end of each sleeve. Just fold it over, and baby's hands are enclosed safely inside his sleeves. And unlike the mitts, he can't escape.

He can still give you a painful whap in the boob, but it hurts a lot less than it does when fingernails are exposed.

Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Weight Loss Plan for New Moms


Follow these steps and watch that baby weight melt away!

1. Get a total of 5 hours sleep, punctuated with hour-long nursing/feeding sessions. This will render you completely incapable of preparing any kind of hearty, nutritious breakfast--your last bit of brain power will be used to operate the coffee machine. Pour a bowl of cereal.

2. Sit down with your bowl of cereal and vat of coffee. Take 2 bites. Baby starts fussing. Pick baby up and attempt to eat with one hand. 3 more bites. Baby starts wailing. Get up and change baby. Return to breakfast, which is now a bowl of mush and vat of ice-cold coffee. Dump cereal in the trash, reheat coffee. 

3. Repeat step 2 for every other meal you might attempt to eat during the day (replacing the cereal with equally convenient, insufficient foods: sandwiches, Lean Cuisines, etc.). 

4. Consider trying to eat something while baby is napping, but fall asleep on the couch before you can pry open a can of tuna.

5. Voila! Baby weight just falls off.


Friday, February 8, 2013

The Unbiased Story of the Cutest Baby Ever Born


My prolonged blog absence and rapidly approaching end to my pregnancy could only mean one thing. It's true--my little chanchito has arrived!

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Javier Joseph (J.J.) was born Saturday, February 2, at 11:49am. Despite our ultrasound tech promising us an 8-9 pound baby, he weighed in at 6lbs, 11oz, and 20.5 inches long.

If you're one of those people who prefer to imagine white storks traversing the earth, dropping off pink and blue bundles to expectant parents, feel free to stop reading right here. But if you love hearing other people's birth stories, then read on!

Friday, February 1, I got my hair cut in the morning (because, you know, soon I'll never have time to do anything alone, ever again!) and then made my way to my regular prenatal appointment. It started with an ultrasound, where we found out the amniotic fluid was very low. Then they checked my blood pressure, which had been high for the last several visits, and found it still elevated. So the doctor said the magic words: "You need to go have a baby--today."

A quick stop for lunch and to pick up my bag, and we were off to the hospital, checking in around 2pm.

I have to admit to being ever so slightly concerned about the nursing staff--2 nurses showed up to say hi, and then 1 said, "You know, I think I'll go get her chart!" Well, there's a novel idea. She came back a half hour later, and still didn't have it.

Finally around 5pm, I got the Cervadil, which was supposed to, and I quote, "ripen" the cervix. Ewww. Unfortunately, it did nothing but give me painful contractions. By 3am, I had made no progress, cervix-wise, and the baby was reacting badly to the Cervadil, so that phase of the induction was over. Next, I was supposed to get Pitocin to bring on contractions, but the baby's heart rate kept dropping whenever I had to get up to pee (which was fairly often, since they were dumping a bunch of fluids in my IV), or changed position. We waited until 9am for it to stabilize, at which point the doctor decided it was now or never. I was started on the lowest dose of Pitocin.

Contractions started again, but baby wasn't having it. His heart rate dropped after each one. I'm sure you can see where this is going: doctor swung by to announce that baby had to come out, and he wasn't going to do it the natural way. I was heading to surgery for a c-section--in 10 minutes!

I had almost no time to wrap my brain around it, which was probably a good thing. The c-section went smoothly, but I was absolutely heartbroken that after 9 months of carrying my little bichito around, everyone and their brother got to hold him before I did. I think they invited a homeless woman in off the street to give him a kiss. When he could, my husband brought him over to me to see, but it felt like hours until I was finally wheeled to recovery and baby was placed on my still-numb chest.

Still, the important thing is, we're all happy and healthy, learning to be a family.

And also, he's the cutest baby ever:

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